Wednesday, August 22, 2012

6.376 months old to be exact...


I love Emmy more and more everyday. 

I didn't think that was possible but it's true. As her personality comes out, I see so much more of her. She is still so sweet and happy. She has moved into a new room at the daycare, Ms. Francis's room and is doing great with the new play space. She isn't crawling yet but enjoys tummy time while the other babies that can crawl smack her feet and bottom to encourage her development. I think that's healthy so I don't mind. Emmy doesn't mind either, not much bothers this kid (this is a Joe characteristic, not mine). 

Her favorites:
1. The jumparoo (BY FAR) this is her favorite thing to do! We call her (inappropriately) the "crack kid" when she jumps and slings herself around laughing hysterically. It makes me so happy to see her like that. 
2. Rufus & Winston. She discovered them a few weeks ago and laughs out loud when they zoom by. Once her eyes catch them in the room, she lunges her whole body toward them, fearless of the ground beneath her. She got a hold of Rufus's hair one time and made him cry but he still licked her once we unclenched her hands. 
3. Hair/people's faces. Emmy just started really looking at people and feels the need to pinch and pull at their noses, eyes, hair, etc to get to know them better. It's painful but I know this is her way of saying "hello". 
4. Her milk. She can hold her bottle on her own every time now. She knows when to expect it and gets very impatient while we are preparing it. She actually eats a little less than most babies and is still 95%… my little chunk.
5. Talking. She is carrying on full conversations although we don't understand it. She has begun saying "daddy" although not in any particular context (unless I think she is saying "daddy, give me a bath tonight" or "daddy, I want you to change my dirty diaper this time". She started referring to me as "cough, cough" because I have bronchitis and she must think that's my name now. She literally fake coughs then looks at me expectantly. I oblige because that's a respectable assumption.

Dislikes:
1. Real food. All of it. She has taken to not squinting so much at bananas and carrots but pears, apples, butternut squash, avocado, peaches, and medleys all get the appalled look after the first bite. I've decided to let the daycare work this out and what do you know… Ms. Francis said she likes it warm with *a little* rice cereal (not too much, don't add any water). God, thank you for daycare. 
2. When Joe and I exit a room. This is a strange new sensation that I have to admit I kind-a like. She likes us now, I mean, really misses us even. When I pick her up at daycare she lights up, big smiles, arms waiving and I usually scoop her up first thing. Today I turned my back to her for just a moment to get her bag and she started balling. I felt so important and loved! Of course, I picked her up immediately laughing a little. She does it at home now if we leave her in her jumparoo and she gets turned around and can't see us. Other times she goes on playing and talking like she doesn't know anyone else is there. 
3. Her teethies. Yeah, at her 4-month check up the doc said they might come in early. Joe and i made bets they would appear early July, then on our birthdays mid-August. STILL NO TEETH. I dislike them too. 

I'm done betting on her progress. Except, I'm betting she'll be crawling in 2 weeks. I feel good about that one with the competition at daycare and her pets always sitting just out of reach. She's not gonna stand that long.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

be kind

Sometimes, I think we forget that people have feelings. 

All of us. That person standing next to you in line at the DMV, the boy bagging your groceries, your neighbor, your husband, your coworkers and even your boss. Everyday we pass people and we forget that they are actually people, living a whole life and having feelings. We affect each other. We can't help it, we're sensitive beings.

I got to thinking about how there is this one person I don't like. I think she is selfish and disrespects other people, she is rude, back stabbing and inconsiderate (let me tell you how I really feel). Then I thought about how she might say that about everyone else. How it might hurt her feelings that she is unliked, unappreciated, disrespected, how people talk about her and how, more than anything, she is misunderstood.

Joe was the first man to teach me how boys are human, how they have feelings and can be hurt. My dad was a sensitive man but I was unsure of boys. I didn't think they were insecure like me. My parents told me I intimidated boys but surely all parents tell their kids that. I found out later that I could be intimidating and I liked to do it intentionally just for fun. 

I remember the first time I hurt Joe's feelings. It was our first fight and I had told him he wasn't "man enough" to stand up to the fraternity guys who kept walking through his room while we were watching a movie. He said, "FINE. THE NEXT PERSON WHO WALKS IN THAT DOOR IS GETTING PUNCHED IN THE FACE". Then a girl walked in and he gladly showed her the way to the bathroom. We both laughed and got over it.  After that, I usually did it when my feelings were hurt but I was too prideful to admit it so I would go all cold eyes and say something I didn't mean to get a reaction, to make him hurt like me. 

The thing is, it's not just the people we love that we hurt. Sometimes, it's that bagger who asked about your day and you ignored, it's the elderly man who tries to talk to you in line and you just stare at your phone and pretend you can't hear him. It's your coworker who is always coming up short on their job, sitting there coping with depression and finding it hard to look forward to another day in the office. 

I don't have many bad things in my life. Sometimes I forget that other people do. Some people are fighting real battles and they have real feelings that I can hurt.

I think we should instate a "feelings appreciation day" to remember to be nice to each other. To help one another, even if you are the one always doing the helping. Even if that person doesn't seem to appreciate you. You never know who is standing on the edge of the battle, teetering on the edge and wondering if it's worth the fight anymore. Sometimes it only takes a smile, a small gesture of kindness to give them one more day in the fight.